Greg on Gadgets, Girls, Games, and Ghetto Ish

For Men

Rules For Men: Dealing With Rejection

Deal With It

I write this in the wake of an not-to-be-named person on Twitter who got publicly blasted. For what you say? For not dealing with rejection well. I know that most men have a huge ego, and no one wants to feel rejected. The problem is when you feel like you have to try to embarrass the woman who rejected you in hopes of maintaining your ego or respect. That, my fellow me, is a no-no. You look foolish as hell trying to down a woman you JUST thought highly enough to talk to, and here’s the dirty little secret: no one believes your antics. We all are laughing at you, not because you got rejected, but because you tried to play it off in such a ridiculous manner. Obviously some of you didn’t have fathers growing up, so allow me to enlighten you in how to deal with rejection with some do’s and don’ts.

Damn sure don't make this face when you approach her.

DON’T

  • Call her out her name once she tells you she isn’t interested.
  • Cat-call from down/across the street to get her attention. That’s disrespectful as hell.
  • Call her “Jeans”, “Hey you in the booty shorts”, “Lil Mama”, “Shorty”, Girl with the big titties”, none of that. Use “Miss”. That way it looks like you have some sort of home training.
  • Say “Well fuck you then,” or any variation of that. You look bitter.
  • (Online) Try to publicly out her or embarrass her. She can easily screenshot your thirst and upload it for the world to see.
  • Ask for some sort of sexual favor off the bat. That’s what Craigslist and prostitutes are for.
  • Try to assault her or accost her in hopes of bullying her number out of her. That’s fucked up. Also IT’S FUCKING ILLEGAL.

This man doesn't know what rejection is.

DO

  • Be respectful.
  • Thank her for her time.
  • Understand that you are selling yourself, almost like a product. If someone didn’t want to buy your knives from Amway, you wouldn’t cuss them out. Play the role.
  • Lead with a proper compliment. An example is, “I just wanted to say that you are looking quite beautiful today…” Not sexy or fuckable, it makes you look like you have a one-track mind.
  • Smile. It goes a long way.
  • Stare at her face. Not her chest or between her legs.

Yeah, your ego takes a blow. But people change their mind, and they do remember the one guy who didn’t act like a jackass when trying to approach them, especially when it’s rare for men of color to do so. If she doesn’t, oh well. You can walk away confident that you conducted yourself as a man, and not as an immature ass.

-GT


Cooking For Women

soup-kitchen-de-93728876

Now, you might think I’m about to start telling women how to cook., but I’m not. Lord knows some of you need to learn in 2011 with all this “eating out” shit and then expecting my black ass to pay for it, but nah, this is about men cooking for women. Now some of you dudes out there ain’t going, for one reason or another, be it because your wack ass moms didn’t teach you because she was too busy shaking her ass at  the club and left you at home with a box of Hot Pockets, or you are saving that shit for marriage or until unless she is doing anal, whatever. Point is, cooking is the shit, it’s easy, and if you haven’t hit it yet, it boosts your chances of it  by at least 50%. Women love that shit, and I’m gonna tell you why.

He's fucking tonight.

1.  Women love a free meal.

They do. They really do. You will be hard-pressed to find a woman bored on a Friday night  that is going to turn down a free meal from a man, regardless on whether she is interested in fucking him tonight, tomorrow, or ever. That disfigured munchkin from 300 can walk into a room of single ladies and say, “Dinner at  Red Lobster,  my treat!” and damn near every woman in there will be down to go. Why? Because that’s one less meal they have to pay for, and they can take  that money and add it to the shoe/club/birth control fund. Also they get taken out, get to dress up and look pretty, and if they are going out with a guy they aren’t interested in, it gives them a chance to scope out other dudes to talk to.

2. Women Like Being Catered To

Women love it when a man rubs their feet, massages  their back, and generally does anything that they usually had to do for  a man. She’s tired of having to rub the back of some unemployed dude who says, “he had a long day,” when all he did was sit up at his boy’s house playing Madden 11. She wants someone to do for her, and cooking is a easy way to do that, because you aren’t just doing for her, your ass gets to eat too. But she doesn’t  see it that way. She sees it as purely done for her.

3. It’s Cheap

Now if you are one of those dudes who think that taking a chick to get a Value Meal at McDonalds counts as a special night, then this isn’t for you in the first place. We don’t cook for hoodrats, sir. Now for the men who like taking them out to places where the bill will be $30 and up, this is for you. Now why spend all that money at Red Lobster for cheddar biscuits when you can make them at home for 1/5th the price? Plus, a bedroom shouldn’t be far, so if things are going really well, she doesn’t have time to think things over about whether she wants to sleep with you.

First this hard wood, then his hard wood.

 

Men, start cooking for these women, and even throw in a foot massage for extra credit as long as her feet don’t look like eagle talons. That’s definitely a proper way to seal a deal.


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